Do You Want Joy?

November 16, 2015

Today’s post is very simple and straight to the point. It’s written to me, and it’s written to you. Funny enough, I wrote the bulk of this post before flying to Charleston, South Carolina for the Creative at Heart Conference that I have been attending both yesterday and today- and the heart of it has already been woven into many of the talks already.

My message written to you today is to stop comparing. Stop comparing your family, or your relationship to hers. Your business to their business. Your schedule to his. Your looks to hers. Your following to her following. Your mothering to her mothering. Whatever it is. If you want to experience JOY in your life, you won’t ever find it in the spirit of comparison. In fact, as I am sure you have heard it shared before, comparison actually STEALS joy. Like a thief. It’s a robbery of what we should value and protect the most- our ability to be content in all circumstances.

Content in the growth. Content in the building process. 

I have been learning that contentment doesn’t mean that I can’t be working hard to get to the next season. Being content doesn’t mean that I can’t be dreaming for what’s next, and setting goals for the things in my life and business that I want to see changed and better. Being content doesn’t mean that I can’t ever desire something bigger or better or different than it is now.

It does mean, that I can have peace and joy in the process. In the getting there. And fully realizing and understanding that “arriving” will never happen. That person you are looking to everyday? That business of their’s that you dream of having? It’s not your destination. And really, it’s not even THEIR destination. We are all, everyday, moving forward.

Last week Katie O. Selvidge shared this paragraph on her Instagram feed, and it was just so influential for my perspective, and too powerful to not share it with you here. She said,

“Stop striving, friend. Stop believing that the path to success, joy, fulfillment, peace or whatever that intentional and good thing is is something outside of your grasp. That idea is a lie and created by people who want you to buy their path. You don’t have to buy a path to get what you want. What truly matters to you is already available to you. Want success? Stop making excuses. Want joy? Stop comparing. Want fulfillment? Stop seeking it in the superficial. Want peace? Stop creating chaos. The path is simple. There may be bumps and it will require some work, but it’s simple. Stop striving, and just take a step.”

Want joy? Stop comparing. Want peace? Stop creating chaos. What fulfillment? Stop seeking it in the artificial. Those words of Katie’s are so full of truth, and I have been thinking about them over and over all weekend long. How often do I complicate what could be so beautifully simple? How often do I seek after the bigger and better, and miss where my feet are? How often do I find myself discouraged by what others have, that it keeps me from enjoying what has been so graciously provided for me?

Do you find yourself striving even in the best of times? I admit that when I find myself feeling ungrateful for what I have- full of doubt and fear, anxious, or even bitter- it’s often because somewhere along the way I began to let comparison take root. In the swipe of a social media feed. In a blog post. In a website launch. In a recognition. It so easily takes hold of me if I don’t carefully keep watch on the attitude of my heart.

Let’s start this week with a deep breath and a fresh perspective. I think we could use a little more of that on Monday, don’t you? Portland Maine Black and White Film Family Photography by Tiffany Farley,

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To learn more about booking your Maine Maternity, Newborn, or Family Portrait Session, or the popular Motherhood Collective, contact Tiffany via the Connect link in the menu, or email directly at TIFFANY@TIFFANYFARLEY.COM

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Tiffany Farley frequently travels for maternity, newborn, and family portrait sessions and has clients from Bar Harbor to San Francisco.  To find out details regarding her upcoming travel dates to a city near you including Southern Connecticut, Rye New York, Charleston, Acadia National Park- or to book a custom travel session, please contact for more information.

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